![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Entry tags:
Dancing Together
Title: Dancing Together
Author: Kat Lee
Fandom: Excalibur/X-Men
Character/Pairing: Rachel Summers/Kitty Pryde, Jean Grey, Lockheed, Ensemble
Rating: Mild R/M
Prompt: So do that dance in the dark - from![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
theladymore ( ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
towerparty )
Warning(s): Femme Slash, Underage Pairing (but not sex), Head!Cannon Teams Assemblage, LGBT Material
Word Count: 3,475
Summary:
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to Marvel Comics and Disney, not the author, and are used without permission.
Carefully, Rachel took a bite. The food was good, but the atmosphere had the potential for deadly violence. She took a look around the table at both people she knew were killers and others who would rather forfeit their own life than ever have to take another. She swallowed hard, took a bite of the meat, and, for a moment, finally forgot about the fight that seemed ready to break out at any moment.
It had been years since she had tasted anything so succulent. She chewed the meat slowly, letting herself savor each second with the juicy, tender pork loin. She almost hated when the first bite ended and quickly grabbed a second. She took her time with it as well, and this time, her green eyes slowly drifted closed. Dear God, it was so good! And yet, it was her mother who had cooked it.
That thought brought her eyes snapping back open, her senses returning to alert, and the meat going down her throat a bit too fast. She grabbed her soda and sipped it before she could start choking, but she still felt like she might choke at any moment as she looked across the table at the woman who was to be her mother.
Everything was so strange in this world. Her mother looked just like she remembered, only with longer hair and younger, but she had never known her. Rachel still remembered how Jean had freaked out when she had first called her her mother. But it was true. She couldn't help it that the woman had no memories of her because she had yet to give birth to her, or even to marry her father. She was still her mother. Rachel couldn't change that any more than she could change any other fact of her past.
Ray nearly jumped when she felt a foot touch hers underneath the table. Her emerald eyes shot to Kitty, who smiled back at her. Every one around them would have thought the kid's smile was innocent, but Rachel noted the guilty twist in the corners of her lips, lips that she very much enjoyed kissing. She put her fork down and moved her feet further underneath her chair. What are you doing? she shot at her telepathically.
What do you think I'm doing? Stop being so grumpy, Ray. We're among friends.
Friends who didn't let us know they weren't dead, Rachel was quick to remind her.
Friends who still love us. Who were trying to protect us, returned Kitty.
Rachel nibbled on a biscuit so that no one would suspect anything, but her eyes didn't leave Kitty's except for one second as she looked at those sitting to either side of her. Logan was a known killer; he wouldn't think twice about slicing and dicing her if he found out what she'd been doing with his pumpkin behind closed doors. Ororo, sitting to Kitty's left, was almost equally attached to her Kitten, and although the former Goddess wasn't a killer, she did wield lightning. Rachel didn't value the thought of being burned to a crisp or even struck once.
Looking back at Kitty, she thought again of their differences, and not just of their age. Kitty was younger and so much more naive and innocent than herself. She hadn't gone through half the damage Rachel had, and the redhead truly hoped she never had to suffer as she had. She didn't want Kitty to know the pain of being repeatedly tortured to within an inch of her life, left alive just so that she could continue to be molded into a weapon of mass destruction, and she wouldn't wish having to track down their friends and family on any one, even her worst enemy, let alone her best friend.
But in the months since they'd been away from the X-Men, Kitty had become much more to her. She had never planned for it to happen. Neither of them had. But once Kitty had kissed her, there had been no turning back. Rachel was strong -- she had had to be to survive the horrible future from whence she had come --, but she wasn't that strong.
So distract me in other ways, Pryde. Don't play footsie with me. Not here. Not under the table when a major fight could break out between our 'friends' at any time.
They're not going to fight. All's forgiven.
Is it? Is it really? How do you so easily forgive somebody for lying to me, for letting you grief for them, for making you cry so many nights?
Kitty finally averted her gaze from Rachel's. She looked down at her plate, and Ray knew she was remembering all the nights she had held her while she had wept for Logan, Ororo, Piotr, and the rest. They had formed Excalibur with Brian and Meggan, who were sitting at the other end of the table with Betsy and her boyfriend, Warren, and Kurt, who sat beside Rachel, his pointed tail swishing underneath the table, only after they had truly believed the rest of the X-Men dead. They never would have left the States otherwise. They wouldn't have left their friends.
But their friends, Kitty's adopted family, had left them. They had allowed them to believe they were dead, and Kitty had grieved and almost given in to her broken heart more than once. Her parents' divorce coupled with the deaths of almost all her friends had almost been more than the teenaged girl could bare. Indeed, if it hadn't been for Rachel being there for her every night without fail, they both knew it would've been.
Kitty, Ray thought softly, her heart tearing at the sorrow she sensed now radiating off of the other girl once again. I'm sorry. I didn't mean --
Lockheed cooed on Kitty's shoulder and bumped his scaly forehead against her cheek. She rubbed her cheek against the dragon's face for a moment, then gave him a piece of meat and looked back across the table at Ray again. You're right, her thought whispered through the telepath's mind. It's not easy, but then, it wasn't easy for them, either.
Rachel smiled sweetly. You're too good, she thought, sending warmth and reassurance with her reply.
No. They are. That's why they couldn't endanger us when they didn't have to. They did what they did out of love, nothing else.
It was still wrong.
We all do wrong things. We have to forgive and forget, move on, live again. Otherwise, our lives would be way too dark. Now, where was I?
Rachel jerked her foot hard, stopping just short of kicking her girlfriend, when Kitty's foot touched her shin. Stop, she ordered angrily, glaring at her. Not here. Not now. Not amongst your friends.
They're your friends, too, Kitty thought back, and Ray could feel the hurt radiating in her mind. And family.
Maybe. But I don't want to be cut down to size by Wolverine for messing with his little girl.
He wouldn't do that. He'd be grateful you've been there for me. They won't care that we're together. They just want us to be happy.
Bull. Even in the future, there were women who --
What, Ray? Kitty asked.
Rachel looked away from her again, tears stinging her green eyes this time. She jabbed her meat with her fork. Forget it, Pryde. Just forget it. But not here, okay? Slowly, her eyes rose back up to hers.
Kitty's mouth opened slightly at the tears she saw glittering in her love's green eyes. Okay, she promised, cramming food into her open mouth before any one could realize that it was open not to eat but because she was so surprised. But we're going to talk about this.
When you're older, Rachel mind-whispered before she could stop herself.
Kitty thumped her fork down.
"Somethin' wrong, punkin?" Logan asked, lowering his beer and looking at her over the top of the can.
"N-no," she answered just a bit too late not to raise suspicion. "I just suddenly lost my appetite is all." She glowered at Rachel. "I think I'm going to be sick."
"Katzchen," Kurt started, but Kitty ignored him as she fled the table.
Ororo calmly laid her napkin beside her plate. "I should have known this would happen. It's all too much for the poor child. I shall return." A cool, Spring like breeze passed through the woman as the proud, African American woman left.
Feeling suddenly more lonely than she had in a long time, despite the crowd of people gathered to share their first co-team meal, Rachel looked back down at her plate. She almost dropped her fork when a gentle mind slipped into hers. There are other ways to calm the child, Rachel. You didn't have to upset her.
The redhead's head jerked up, and her green eyes looked straight into a pair that looked so much like her own, except older. One, get out of my mind, and two, you have no idea what you're talking about.
Jean smiled calmly. I apologize for the instruction, she replied honestly, but I do believe I do.
No, you don't.
You insist in calling me your mother.
That's because you are.
Maybe. Maybe not. There are so many possible futures for us all. When I do have children, I hope I have a little girl a lot like you --
You will have me, Rachel thought defiantly.
If I'm lucky. Jean's smile grew, and Rachel found herself unusually speechless. How could she argue with that response, after all? It was true that they couldn't possibly know for a fact that this particular world in which she now lived would prove to be her future, and past, but Jean did actually want her. She swallowed a lump of potatoes before she could say something she regretted, like giving away her awe.
Something has clearly changed between the two of you, Jean resumed. Deny it if you want, but give me -- as your mother or your friend -- some credit. I know when my daughter's playing footsie underneath the table.
I was not -- ! She -- Again, Rachel bite hard into her food to keep from giving away her emotions.
She started it? Jean asked, and her grin took on a teasing turn. Why am I not surprised?
You're not?
No. Jean sipped her sweet tea, thinking over her words before she spoke more to her future daughter. As X-Men, I've encountered a lot of different people. We all have, and we all know what it feels like to be hated and feared because we're different. The X-Men were originally formed, in a way, to combat prejudice. Who are we to judge?
Rachel was quiet for a long moment. She chewed her meat as she pondered her mother's question. The woman really was too smart at reading people and deducing secrets, but then, that all came with being a telepath, as Ray knew well. Finally, knowing it would do no good to lie, she asked in a hushed mind-whisper, Even though she's only fifteen?
Kitty's always been older than her years. She led a team through a successful battle when she was only fourteen.
So? She's still just fifteen.
Have you had sex?
MOM!!!!
Well, have you?
Rachel's cheeks were now as red as her hair. She fervently hoped nobody looked at her and tried to hide a bit behind her can of soda as she rapidly swallowed gulps of it. No, she admitted at last as she could tell that her mother wasn't going to let the question drop. We . . . We agreed she's too young for that.
Then I don't see what the problem is.
We -- We --
So you're gay, and she's bisexual. Are you both bisexual?
MOM!!!
Jean shrugged and calmly took a bite of her own meat. Either way, there's no reason to be ashamed, Rachel, as long as you follow your hearts and do nothing either of you will regret later.
But Kitty's so young. She might regret us. There it was, she realized. That was one of her worst fears: that Kitty would one day wake up older, smarter, and sick of being with a woman, sick of being with her.
Kitty's young, Jean returned knowingly, but only in literal age. She's more together and smarter and knows herself better than a lot of adults we both know. She won't regret you.
You sound so certain.
I am. You should go to her, talk to her.
Here?
Why not?
Everybody will know something's going on between us.
So what if they do? We won't judge you, Rachel, either of you.
Hmph. I wish I could believe that. She eyed Logan's claw as he used it to open another can of beer.
We all love you both. We only want you to be happy. But if you're not comfortable coming out of the closet yet, that's your decision. Keep it secret, but don't cull your feelings. Don't hurt you both just because you're afraid of Kitty's age or what people might think.
Not people. You. Dad.
And Wolverine. And Ororo. And Kurt.
Okay. All of you! I don't care what the world thinks of me, but I do care what Kitty's world thinks. I . . . I don't want her to lose face. I don't want any of this to come back to hurt her in any way.
It won't. I know you don't believe me now, Rachel, but maybe it would help if I told you Professor Xavier and Magneto used to play footsie underneath this very table.
But Professor's not able to walk.
He was at one time, Jean reminded her daughter. For a short while. Her gaze shifted to the old man at the head of their table. He had become like a father to almost every one there, and she loved him dearly. They all did. None of us rebuffed him for trying to be happy with the man he loved. We won't do it to you either, to either of you.
Jean set her glass of tea down and looked directly into Rachel's wide, green eyes once more. But I know you don't believe me. You call me your mother, but you don't trust me yet. I understand that, and I don't blame you. But don't let the two of you suffer now. Don't let either of you suffer when you don't have to. Ever.
If you don't want the world to know yet, that's okay. If you don't want us to know yet, that's okay, too. But don't hurt yourselves. Follow your hearts. Do what you want. Hide it if you must; do that dance in the dark.
Rachel blushed crimson again. I told you we don't --
You don't have sex. That's not a big deal. Sex isn't really an important part of a relationship. Jean smiled as Rachel's blush deepened. It's nice. Don't get me wrong. But it's not important. What is important is how the two of you feel about each other. Kiss. Hug. Literally dance. Play footsie in the dark. But don't hide your feelings from each other or try to shut her out because you're afraid of what the world might think.
The world can --
Yes, I know. The world can screw itself, and it does quite often. But you are afraid, as you said yourself, of what Kitty's world will think of her. So do that dance in the dark. And know when you're ready, I'll be happy to stand beside you both.
Jean sipped her tea again, then inclined her red head in the direction Kitty had ran. Now go to her already, Ray.
Rachel hesitated one moment longer. She wiped her mouth with her napkin, then laid it beside her unfinished plate of great food and pushed her chair back away from the table. Without a word, she left the table, but she did smile again at her mother and thought sincerely, Thanks, Mom.
Kurt glanced up as Rachel passed behind him. Then his yellow eyes met Jean's green ones. He, too, said not a word aloud, but his knowing smile spoke volumes. Jean grinned back at him. His tail twitched, and they both returned to their meal.
It didn't take long for Rachel to find Kitty in her old room. She simply followed the distressed signals of her mind and arrived just as Ororo was slipping out of the room. 'Ro's eyes met Rachel's nervous, green ones; then she smiled. "I am glad you came. I believe you are the one she wants to see." She patted Ray's shoulder and left them alone.
Still wowed by her mother's clear and Ororo's apparent support, Rachel creaked the door open and poked her head in. "Kitty?" she asked.
Kitty sat, hugging a pillow to her chest. Lockheed was wrapped around her shoulders, cooing softly, but her tear-soaked face was buried in her pillow. "Go 'way," she murmured against the cotton.
"No," Rachel said decisively, stepped in, and shut her door behind her.
Kitty's brown eyes slowly rose out of the safe shield of her pillow. "I'm too young," she shot back at her.
Rachel crossed the room, sat down beside her, and swept a strand of her long, brown hair out of her face. Her fingers lingered in her hair. "I'm sorry," she spoke truthfully. "You're much older than your years."
"Yeah." Kitty sniffed. "I am."
Rachel grinned teasingly. "Even when you act like this."
"Ray, I was hurt. You still don't trust me -- "
Rachel cupped her face. "I do trust you," she told her strongly, brushing some of her tears away with her bare thumbs. "I didn't tell you what I was thinking, because you're too young to hear about it. I didn't tell you, because you're too young to have to endure knowing about some of the things I know about."
Kitty's head shook in Rachel's hands. "I know my own mind, Rachel. I'm old enough to know about what I want to know about, and about the truths of the world. What were you going to tell me? That there are still women who love each other and are hurt because of it in your world? That happens every day here. Heck, in some third world countries, women are even killed if they're found loving another woman."
Rachel stilled. "What?" Kitty asked curiously. She searched her eyes and took a deep intake of her own breath. "They're still killed in the future."
"Yes," Rachel answered hesitantly, "and more. Kitty, I'm sorry. I just didn't want you to be hurt. I want to protect you, and that isn't just because of your age. I love you. You're my best friend and more. That's why I wanted to protect you."
Kitty beamed. "I love you, too, Ray, but I'm old enough to know my own mind. I'm old enough to save the world, and I'm old enough to be with the woman with whom I want to be. I'm old enough to know my friends and family -- my real friends and family won't care who I'm with, as long as we're happy. And I am happy with you. You make me happy. Even when it seems impossible, even when the whole world seems turned against us, and I shouldn't have reason not to cry, you still find ways to make me happy. Being with you -- loving you -- makes me happy. I love you," she said again.
Rachel's face, too, was alight with her smile by now. "I love you, too," she breathed against her mouth, then touched her lips to her. She kissed her long and deep, and for the first time, it was Kitty's mouth who first entered Rachel's. Their tongues danced together, and Rachel realized what her mother had meant. Dancing wasn't just dancing, and it wasn't sex, either. Dancing could be as simple, innocent, and wonderful as two hearts dancing together. That's what she'd been doing with Kitty, both older and younger, for years, and what she hoped to do for the rest of her life, however long or short it proved to be.
It was Kitty who had deepened their kiss, but it was also Kitty who now stopped kissing her. She lifted her mouth from hers, and Rachel, although she didn't really want to, let her go. Their foreheads were still pressed together, Kitty's beautiful face stilled cupped in Ray's loving hands, when Kitty asked her, "So no more hiding, okay?"
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Sure you won't have any regrets?"
"Yes!"
Rachel finally nodded. "Okay." Her thumbs swept over Kitty's smiling, upturned lips. "I love you, Pryde."
"I love you, too, Rachel, with all my heart and all my mind, and I know both."
"I know you do," she whispered, and they kissed again and again, their hearts, and their tongues, dancing once more together.
The End
Tag:raktajinos / Prompt: Your ___________ is mightier.
Author: Kat Lee
Fandom: Excalibur/X-Men
Character/Pairing: Rachel Summers/Kitty Pryde, Jean Grey, Lockheed, Ensemble
Rating: Mild R/M
Prompt: So do that dance in the dark - from
theladymore ( towerparty )Warning(s): Femme Slash, Underage Pairing (but not sex), Head!Cannon Teams Assemblage, LGBT Material
Word Count: 3,475
Summary:
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to Marvel Comics and Disney, not the author, and are used without permission.
Carefully, Rachel took a bite. The food was good, but the atmosphere had the potential for deadly violence. She took a look around the table at both people she knew were killers and others who would rather forfeit their own life than ever have to take another. She swallowed hard, took a bite of the meat, and, for a moment, finally forgot about the fight that seemed ready to break out at any moment.
It had been years since she had tasted anything so succulent. She chewed the meat slowly, letting herself savor each second with the juicy, tender pork loin. She almost hated when the first bite ended and quickly grabbed a second. She took her time with it as well, and this time, her green eyes slowly drifted closed. Dear God, it was so good! And yet, it was her mother who had cooked it.
That thought brought her eyes snapping back open, her senses returning to alert, and the meat going down her throat a bit too fast. She grabbed her soda and sipped it before she could start choking, but she still felt like she might choke at any moment as she looked across the table at the woman who was to be her mother.
Everything was so strange in this world. Her mother looked just like she remembered, only with longer hair and younger, but she had never known her. Rachel still remembered how Jean had freaked out when she had first called her her mother. But it was true. She couldn't help it that the woman had no memories of her because she had yet to give birth to her, or even to marry her father. She was still her mother. Rachel couldn't change that any more than she could change any other fact of her past.
Ray nearly jumped when she felt a foot touch hers underneath the table. Her emerald eyes shot to Kitty, who smiled back at her. Every one around them would have thought the kid's smile was innocent, but Rachel noted the guilty twist in the corners of her lips, lips that she very much enjoyed kissing. She put her fork down and moved her feet further underneath her chair. What are you doing? she shot at her telepathically.
What do you think I'm doing? Stop being so grumpy, Ray. We're among friends.
Friends who didn't let us know they weren't dead, Rachel was quick to remind her.
Friends who still love us. Who were trying to protect us, returned Kitty.
Rachel nibbled on a biscuit so that no one would suspect anything, but her eyes didn't leave Kitty's except for one second as she looked at those sitting to either side of her. Logan was a known killer; he wouldn't think twice about slicing and dicing her if he found out what she'd been doing with his pumpkin behind closed doors. Ororo, sitting to Kitty's left, was almost equally attached to her Kitten, and although the former Goddess wasn't a killer, she did wield lightning. Rachel didn't value the thought of being burned to a crisp or even struck once.
Looking back at Kitty, she thought again of their differences, and not just of their age. Kitty was younger and so much more naive and innocent than herself. She hadn't gone through half the damage Rachel had, and the redhead truly hoped she never had to suffer as she had. She didn't want Kitty to know the pain of being repeatedly tortured to within an inch of her life, left alive just so that she could continue to be molded into a weapon of mass destruction, and she wouldn't wish having to track down their friends and family on any one, even her worst enemy, let alone her best friend.
But in the months since they'd been away from the X-Men, Kitty had become much more to her. She had never planned for it to happen. Neither of them had. But once Kitty had kissed her, there had been no turning back. Rachel was strong -- she had had to be to survive the horrible future from whence she had come --, but she wasn't that strong.
So distract me in other ways, Pryde. Don't play footsie with me. Not here. Not under the table when a major fight could break out between our 'friends' at any time.
They're not going to fight. All's forgiven.
Is it? Is it really? How do you so easily forgive somebody for lying to me, for letting you grief for them, for making you cry so many nights?
Kitty finally averted her gaze from Rachel's. She looked down at her plate, and Ray knew she was remembering all the nights she had held her while she had wept for Logan, Ororo, Piotr, and the rest. They had formed Excalibur with Brian and Meggan, who were sitting at the other end of the table with Betsy and her boyfriend, Warren, and Kurt, who sat beside Rachel, his pointed tail swishing underneath the table, only after they had truly believed the rest of the X-Men dead. They never would have left the States otherwise. They wouldn't have left their friends.
But their friends, Kitty's adopted family, had left them. They had allowed them to believe they were dead, and Kitty had grieved and almost given in to her broken heart more than once. Her parents' divorce coupled with the deaths of almost all her friends had almost been more than the teenaged girl could bare. Indeed, if it hadn't been for Rachel being there for her every night without fail, they both knew it would've been.
Kitty, Ray thought softly, her heart tearing at the sorrow she sensed now radiating off of the other girl once again. I'm sorry. I didn't mean --
Lockheed cooed on Kitty's shoulder and bumped his scaly forehead against her cheek. She rubbed her cheek against the dragon's face for a moment, then gave him a piece of meat and looked back across the table at Ray again. You're right, her thought whispered through the telepath's mind. It's not easy, but then, it wasn't easy for them, either.
Rachel smiled sweetly. You're too good, she thought, sending warmth and reassurance with her reply.
No. They are. That's why they couldn't endanger us when they didn't have to. They did what they did out of love, nothing else.
It was still wrong.
We all do wrong things. We have to forgive and forget, move on, live again. Otherwise, our lives would be way too dark. Now, where was I?
Rachel jerked her foot hard, stopping just short of kicking her girlfriend, when Kitty's foot touched her shin. Stop, she ordered angrily, glaring at her. Not here. Not now. Not amongst your friends.
They're your friends, too, Kitty thought back, and Ray could feel the hurt radiating in her mind. And family.
Maybe. But I don't want to be cut down to size by Wolverine for messing with his little girl.
He wouldn't do that. He'd be grateful you've been there for me. They won't care that we're together. They just want us to be happy.
Bull. Even in the future, there were women who --
What, Ray? Kitty asked.
Rachel looked away from her again, tears stinging her green eyes this time. She jabbed her meat with her fork. Forget it, Pryde. Just forget it. But not here, okay? Slowly, her eyes rose back up to hers.
Kitty's mouth opened slightly at the tears she saw glittering in her love's green eyes. Okay, she promised, cramming food into her open mouth before any one could realize that it was open not to eat but because she was so surprised. But we're going to talk about this.
When you're older, Rachel mind-whispered before she could stop herself.
Kitty thumped her fork down.
"Somethin' wrong, punkin?" Logan asked, lowering his beer and looking at her over the top of the can.
"N-no," she answered just a bit too late not to raise suspicion. "I just suddenly lost my appetite is all." She glowered at Rachel. "I think I'm going to be sick."
"Katzchen," Kurt started, but Kitty ignored him as she fled the table.
Ororo calmly laid her napkin beside her plate. "I should have known this would happen. It's all too much for the poor child. I shall return." A cool, Spring like breeze passed through the woman as the proud, African American woman left.
Feeling suddenly more lonely than she had in a long time, despite the crowd of people gathered to share their first co-team meal, Rachel looked back down at her plate. She almost dropped her fork when a gentle mind slipped into hers. There are other ways to calm the child, Rachel. You didn't have to upset her.
The redhead's head jerked up, and her green eyes looked straight into a pair that looked so much like her own, except older. One, get out of my mind, and two, you have no idea what you're talking about.
Jean smiled calmly. I apologize for the instruction, she replied honestly, but I do believe I do.
No, you don't.
You insist in calling me your mother.
That's because you are.
Maybe. Maybe not. There are so many possible futures for us all. When I do have children, I hope I have a little girl a lot like you --
You will have me, Rachel thought defiantly.
If I'm lucky. Jean's smile grew, and Rachel found herself unusually speechless. How could she argue with that response, after all? It was true that they couldn't possibly know for a fact that this particular world in which she now lived would prove to be her future, and past, but Jean did actually want her. She swallowed a lump of potatoes before she could say something she regretted, like giving away her awe.
Something has clearly changed between the two of you, Jean resumed. Deny it if you want, but give me -- as your mother or your friend -- some credit. I know when my daughter's playing footsie underneath the table.
I was not -- ! She -- Again, Rachel bite hard into her food to keep from giving away her emotions.
She started it? Jean asked, and her grin took on a teasing turn. Why am I not surprised?
You're not?
No. Jean sipped her sweet tea, thinking over her words before she spoke more to her future daughter. As X-Men, I've encountered a lot of different people. We all have, and we all know what it feels like to be hated and feared because we're different. The X-Men were originally formed, in a way, to combat prejudice. Who are we to judge?
Rachel was quiet for a long moment. She chewed her meat as she pondered her mother's question. The woman really was too smart at reading people and deducing secrets, but then, that all came with being a telepath, as Ray knew well. Finally, knowing it would do no good to lie, she asked in a hushed mind-whisper, Even though she's only fifteen?
Kitty's always been older than her years. She led a team through a successful battle when she was only fourteen.
So? She's still just fifteen.
Have you had sex?
MOM!!!!
Well, have you?
Rachel's cheeks were now as red as her hair. She fervently hoped nobody looked at her and tried to hide a bit behind her can of soda as she rapidly swallowed gulps of it. No, she admitted at last as she could tell that her mother wasn't going to let the question drop. We . . . We agreed she's too young for that.
Then I don't see what the problem is.
We -- We --
So you're gay, and she's bisexual. Are you both bisexual?
MOM!!!
Jean shrugged and calmly took a bite of her own meat. Either way, there's no reason to be ashamed, Rachel, as long as you follow your hearts and do nothing either of you will regret later.
But Kitty's so young. She might regret us. There it was, she realized. That was one of her worst fears: that Kitty would one day wake up older, smarter, and sick of being with a woman, sick of being with her.
Kitty's young, Jean returned knowingly, but only in literal age. She's more together and smarter and knows herself better than a lot of adults we both know. She won't regret you.
You sound so certain.
I am. You should go to her, talk to her.
Here?
Why not?
Everybody will know something's going on between us.
So what if they do? We won't judge you, Rachel, either of you.
Hmph. I wish I could believe that. She eyed Logan's claw as he used it to open another can of beer.
We all love you both. We only want you to be happy. But if you're not comfortable coming out of the closet yet, that's your decision. Keep it secret, but don't cull your feelings. Don't hurt you both just because you're afraid of Kitty's age or what people might think.
Not people. You. Dad.
And Wolverine. And Ororo. And Kurt.
Okay. All of you! I don't care what the world thinks of me, but I do care what Kitty's world thinks. I . . . I don't want her to lose face. I don't want any of this to come back to hurt her in any way.
It won't. I know you don't believe me now, Rachel, but maybe it would help if I told you Professor Xavier and Magneto used to play footsie underneath this very table.
But Professor's not able to walk.
He was at one time, Jean reminded her daughter. For a short while. Her gaze shifted to the old man at the head of their table. He had become like a father to almost every one there, and she loved him dearly. They all did. None of us rebuffed him for trying to be happy with the man he loved. We won't do it to you either, to either of you.
Jean set her glass of tea down and looked directly into Rachel's wide, green eyes once more. But I know you don't believe me. You call me your mother, but you don't trust me yet. I understand that, and I don't blame you. But don't let the two of you suffer now. Don't let either of you suffer when you don't have to. Ever.
If you don't want the world to know yet, that's okay. If you don't want us to know yet, that's okay, too. But don't hurt yourselves. Follow your hearts. Do what you want. Hide it if you must; do that dance in the dark.
Rachel blushed crimson again. I told you we don't --
You don't have sex. That's not a big deal. Sex isn't really an important part of a relationship. Jean smiled as Rachel's blush deepened. It's nice. Don't get me wrong. But it's not important. What is important is how the two of you feel about each other. Kiss. Hug. Literally dance. Play footsie in the dark. But don't hide your feelings from each other or try to shut her out because you're afraid of what the world might think.
The world can --
Yes, I know. The world can screw itself, and it does quite often. But you are afraid, as you said yourself, of what Kitty's world will think of her. So do that dance in the dark. And know when you're ready, I'll be happy to stand beside you both.
Jean sipped her tea again, then inclined her red head in the direction Kitty had ran. Now go to her already, Ray.
Rachel hesitated one moment longer. She wiped her mouth with her napkin, then laid it beside her unfinished plate of great food and pushed her chair back away from the table. Without a word, she left the table, but she did smile again at her mother and thought sincerely, Thanks, Mom.
Kurt glanced up as Rachel passed behind him. Then his yellow eyes met Jean's green ones. He, too, said not a word aloud, but his knowing smile spoke volumes. Jean grinned back at him. His tail twitched, and they both returned to their meal.
It didn't take long for Rachel to find Kitty in her old room. She simply followed the distressed signals of her mind and arrived just as Ororo was slipping out of the room. 'Ro's eyes met Rachel's nervous, green ones; then she smiled. "I am glad you came. I believe you are the one she wants to see." She patted Ray's shoulder and left them alone.
Still wowed by her mother's clear and Ororo's apparent support, Rachel creaked the door open and poked her head in. "Kitty?" she asked.
Kitty sat, hugging a pillow to her chest. Lockheed was wrapped around her shoulders, cooing softly, but her tear-soaked face was buried in her pillow. "Go 'way," she murmured against the cotton.
"No," Rachel said decisively, stepped in, and shut her door behind her.
Kitty's brown eyes slowly rose out of the safe shield of her pillow. "I'm too young," she shot back at her.
Rachel crossed the room, sat down beside her, and swept a strand of her long, brown hair out of her face. Her fingers lingered in her hair. "I'm sorry," she spoke truthfully. "You're much older than your years."
"Yeah." Kitty sniffed. "I am."
Rachel grinned teasingly. "Even when you act like this."
"Ray, I was hurt. You still don't trust me -- "
Rachel cupped her face. "I do trust you," she told her strongly, brushing some of her tears away with her bare thumbs. "I didn't tell you what I was thinking, because you're too young to hear about it. I didn't tell you, because you're too young to have to endure knowing about some of the things I know about."
Kitty's head shook in Rachel's hands. "I know my own mind, Rachel. I'm old enough to know about what I want to know about, and about the truths of the world. What were you going to tell me? That there are still women who love each other and are hurt because of it in your world? That happens every day here. Heck, in some third world countries, women are even killed if they're found loving another woman."
Rachel stilled. "What?" Kitty asked curiously. She searched her eyes and took a deep intake of her own breath. "They're still killed in the future."
"Yes," Rachel answered hesitantly, "and more. Kitty, I'm sorry. I just didn't want you to be hurt. I want to protect you, and that isn't just because of your age. I love you. You're my best friend and more. That's why I wanted to protect you."
Kitty beamed. "I love you, too, Ray, but I'm old enough to know my own mind. I'm old enough to save the world, and I'm old enough to be with the woman with whom I want to be. I'm old enough to know my friends and family -- my real friends and family won't care who I'm with, as long as we're happy. And I am happy with you. You make me happy. Even when it seems impossible, even when the whole world seems turned against us, and I shouldn't have reason not to cry, you still find ways to make me happy. Being with you -- loving you -- makes me happy. I love you," she said again.
Rachel's face, too, was alight with her smile by now. "I love you, too," she breathed against her mouth, then touched her lips to her. She kissed her long and deep, and for the first time, it was Kitty's mouth who first entered Rachel's. Their tongues danced together, and Rachel realized what her mother had meant. Dancing wasn't just dancing, and it wasn't sex, either. Dancing could be as simple, innocent, and wonderful as two hearts dancing together. That's what she'd been doing with Kitty, both older and younger, for years, and what she hoped to do for the rest of her life, however long or short it proved to be.
It was Kitty who had deepened their kiss, but it was also Kitty who now stopped kissing her. She lifted her mouth from hers, and Rachel, although she didn't really want to, let her go. Their foreheads were still pressed together, Kitty's beautiful face stilled cupped in Ray's loving hands, when Kitty asked her, "So no more hiding, okay?"
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Sure you won't have any regrets?"
"Yes!"
Rachel finally nodded. "Okay." Her thumbs swept over Kitty's smiling, upturned lips. "I love you, Pryde."
"I love you, too, Rachel, with all my heart and all my mind, and I know both."
"I know you do," she whispered, and they kissed again and again, their hearts, and their tongues, dancing once more together.
The End
Tag:
raktajinos / Prompt: Your ___________ is mightier.