katleept

Title: "The Tales of Los Almas"
Author: Pirates Sparrow and Turner
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Infamous Gypsy Jack Sparrow awakes alone with no clothes, no weapons, and no idea how he got to be in a saloon. As he continues running from the man who murdered his people, Jack falls in love with a white Indian who goes by the names of Golden Bear and Hansel (Owen Wilson) and becomes entangled in Salem Saberhagen's plan to save the world. Other characters also having their own adventures and finding their loves of their lives include, but are in no means limited to, Hansel's sister Faith; Cole Turner, the Demon trying to go good for the love of the Witch Piper Halliwell; Captain James T. Hook, who already has his beloved in Samuel Smee but must fight to keep their peaceful freedom; Doctor Hank McCoy, who is believed dead though very much alive; Robert Drake, the man mourning the good doctor and his treasured love; Will Turner, who seeks to put an end to the man who killed his family, who is the same man who killed Jack's, and shall find his love in a place beyond his wildest dreams; Lorne, the green-skinned Demon with the heart and voice of an Angel; Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, who sets her eyes on a Werewolf who she knows she can never dare to openly love; Jareth, King of the Goblins, and his wife Delvira, identical sister to Elvira and another purely evil; Dawson Leery, the greenhorn reporter who's just arrived in the West when he falls for gunwoman Faith; farmboy Clark Kent who's truly so much more; the city slicker he saves from certain death, Lex Luthor; Sheriff Sean Cassidy; his Deputies, Carlos Sandoval and Trent Malloy, who share much more than family; Wolf and Brendan, two Werewolves struggling to contain their inner monsters; bounty hunter Victor Creed; Logan, the thief Victor left behind and his daughters, Kitty Pryde and Jubilation Lee; highwayman Addamm (Adam Ant); the cursed Mad Hatter; his good friends, one of whom may be more than a friend, Cheshire Cat and Puss in Boots; Wizard Harry Dresden and the man he loves though he can not touch him, Bob; wild man Ace Ventura; and circus "freaks", Kurt Wagner, Piotr Rasputian, and Rahne Sinclair.
Spoilers: None
Warnings: Slash, Het, Alternate Universe, Violence, Adult Sexual Content
Word Count: 195,126 and going strong!
Feedback: Yes, please! However, flames will be doused with a fine mixture of fireballs, lightning, energy balls, and Faith-itude!
Archive: WWOMB, FF.net; anywhere else, ask and I'll probably say yes
Disclaimer: (PotC) Jack Sparrow; Will Turner; Joshamee Gibbs; Davy Jones; Bootstrap Bill Turner; (Zoolander) Hansel; Derek; (Angel/BtVS) Faith; Joyce, Buffy, and Dawn Summers; Lorne; (Dawson's Creek) Dawson Leery; (Charmed) Penny, Patty, Prue, Piper, Phoebe, and Paige Halliwell; Cole Turner; (Golden Girls) Blanche Deveraux; Rose Nylund; Coco; Sophia Petrillo; Dorothy; (10th Kingdom) Wolf; Blabberwort; Burly; Bluebell; King Radish; the Huntsman; (X-Men/Generation X) Robert "Bobby" "Iceman" Drake; Henry "Hank" "Beast" McCoy; Lucas Bishop; Remy "Gambit" LeBeau; Sean "Banshee" Cassidy; Emma "White Queen" Frost; Victor "Sabertooth" Creed; Rahne "Wolfsbane" Sinclair; Kurt "Nightcrawler" Wagner; Piotr "Colossus" Rasputian; Blob; Spiral; Mister Sinister; Avalanche; Pyro; (Elvira) Elvira; (Walker/Sons of Thunder) Trent Malloy; Carlos Sandoval; Cordell Walker; James Trivette; Alex Kahill; Sydney Cooke; Francis Gage; (Smallville) Lex and Lionel Luthor; Jonathan, Martha, and Clark Kent; (Step By Step) Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux; (Gilmore Girls) Lorelei and Rory Gilmore; (Special Unit 2) Carl; (TM7) Vin Tanner; Nathan Jackson; Chris Larabee; (Sabrina the Teenage Witch) Salem Saberhagen; Zelda, Hilda, and Sabrina Spellman; Drell; (Shrek) Donkey; Puss in Boots; Dragon; Piper; (Ace Ventura) Ace Ventura; (Music Videos) Addamm; (Alice in Wonderland) Mad Hatter; the Cheshire Cat; Imogene; (Labyrinth) Fieries; Jareth; Hoggle; Sir Didymus; Ludo; Worm; (The Dresden Files) Harry Dresden; Bob; (Peter Pan) Captain James T. Hook; Smee; (Kim Possible) Shego; Drakken; any other recognizable characters, unless otherwise specifically noted herein; Pirates of the Caribbean; Zoolander; Buffy the Vampire Slayer; Angel; Dawson's Creek; Charmed; Golden Girls; 10th Kingdom; X-Men; Walker: Texas Ranger; Sons of Thunder; Smallville; Step By Step; Gilmore Girls; Generation X; Special Unit 2; The Magnificent Seven; Sabrina the Teenage Witch; Shrek; Ace Ventura; Labyrinth; The Dresden Files, Peter Pan, and Kim Possible are © & TM their respective owners, not the authors, and are used without permission. Any recognizable songs mentioned are © & TM their respective owners, not the authors, and used without permission. Willow is © & TM himself and may not be used without permission. Trina Malloy, Markus, Doctor Brendan Richards, Big and Little Wild Cat, Cat, Tornado, Bessie, Tonto, Old Gopher, Sly Fox, Clyde, Kathleen "Kat" O'Hara, Jamey, Falisha, Delvira, and everything else, unless otherwise stated within the chapter contained, is © & TM the authors. The authors make absolutely no profit off of this work of fan fiction, and no copyright infringement is intended.